Here am I.

I've found that anonymity has no place in life. The well lived life is defined by the flow of information. The more I learn and the more I teach the better my life will be. The subject of this blog will be my self; my thoughts, feelings, observations, beliefs, as much as I can lay bare to you.
This does not mean that I disregard the control of information, I will carry certain secrets to my grave. This means that I recognize how powerful this information can be and I try to treat it with the respect it deserves.
As such there will be no gossip, no news, no lies, no fiction displayed here. I will share prudently in order to guard the lives and secrets of those I love while still sharing what depth of understanding they've helped me to attain.
I don't know how long this will last. This may be a flight of fancy or a capricious whim, it may find its way into the annals of history. Whatever the case may be, my only intention is to use this tool to build my life and my self. I only hope that my life is worth living, and that I am worth knowing.
You are welcome to read, you are welcome to comment, you are welcome to enter my experience in whatever way you see fit. But please, respect me for who I am.

Tuesday, July 19, 2011

That I spoke at all...

Preface:
You'll discover quickly that most of the lessons I've learned involve a dictionary very early on in the process. Don't be surprised if you need one too.

Today I spoke with a very dear friend about a bad habit of mine. My sense of humor is often scathing, and I habitually and casually toss out jibes and cutting remarks in the course of conversation. It's not so malicious as it may sound (in most circles my comments would fall well within the bounds of friendly teasing) but this wonderful person took offense at the careless and caustic remarks that I have made.

I try not to give offense, and when I do I work hard to repair it completely. So I began to suss out the limits of good humor and address what it is that I should and should not say. I immediately ran to my dictionary and found this.

Profanity: noun: the quality of being profane irreverence.


Wait a second, if profanity isn't just dirty words then what does it mean to be profane?


Profane: adjective: characterized by irreverence or contempt for god or sacred principles or things; irreligious.


Good heavens, what have I done? Is there anything more sacred than God's own children? Any snarky or cutting comment, no matter how casual or "friendly" it may seem, is not just an insult to a child of God but an insult to God himself. How can I exhibit such blatant irreverence in nearly every conversation I have and still say that I am a God fearing man? 


I need to change the way I behave. I need to speak with love and respect in everything that I do. I need to strengthen my brothers and sisters in all of my conversations. I'm disappointed in myself, that I let this go on unchecked for so long. I'm disappointed that I wasn't prepared to make this change before, when another loved one made a similar remark. But I am thrilled that I can change, that I can repent of my carelessness and move ever closer to heaven.